Twisted love
by Kosmic King
Summary: When Stan falls for Bertha one night and cheats on Wendy, bad stuff is destined to follow... how will the relationship of Stan and Wendy survive all this?
1. Chapter 1

South Park: Stanley and Wendy star in 'Twisted love.'

Chapter 1: An unexpected complication...

It was a cold winter day in South Park, but a group of 4 eleven year old boys didn't care. Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Eric were all out snowboarding...

Stan: Dude! I just hit an awesome distance record!

Kyle: Swet dude!

Cartman: Just watch! This one will be kick-ass!

Kyle: More like fucking FAT-ASS!

Cartman: Eh, don't call me fat you fucking jew!

Stan: Calm down you two! It's Kenny's turn anyway!

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the town, a girl named Wendy was preparing for the night...

Wendy: Alright Bebe, how do I look?

Bebe: Wow, you look super hot Wendy!

Wendy was wearing a sleeveless blue shirt, a white pearl neckless, a yellow skirt with a black belt over it, and her beret also...

Wendy: This dress is sure to get Stan to love me even more!

Bebe: Yeah, it should really do the trick!

Later, the boys return home and Stan gets ready for the date...

Stan: Okay, I think I'll wear this green Terrance and Phillip shirt, and I'll wear this old business suit over it! This will make Wendy think I'm smart...

Kyle: You know, Stan. There is more to love than some crappy little image one brings...

Stan: Yeah, but I know that this will work!

Cartman: Shut up! The only date you could make a success is one with Kyle!

Stan: Don't call me gay you fucking dick! At least I have a penis that is over 2.4 inches in length.

Cartman: Don't criticize my fucking penis size you piece of pure shit!

Kenny: - - - - - - - - -.

Stan: Yeah, Kenny's right, we shouldn't fight like this. Besides, I gotta go to my date now. See you guys!

Later, Stan is walking down to the restaurant that there date is at, when he bumps into Bertha AKA Red of all people...

Stan remembered her from the time when all girls became stupid spoiled whores, she even tried to kiss him, and that was when the party stopped. Who knew what she was planning to do with him that night...

Red: Hey Stan! You going somewhere?

Stan: Actually, yes! I'm going on a date with my girlfriend!

Red: Say no more! With Wendy I assume? God, that girl is such a bitch at times! I mean, she even had to ruin our scheme to get free shoes from Clyde! Hell, she even came knocking on my door, remember? Good thing I tell her to fuck off that day, huh?

Stan: Listen, she'll kill me if I am late for my date! I really gotta run...

Red: But Stan! Don't you remember our times together, remember when we almost kissed!

Stan: Don't remind me! Now let me go, I gotta see my girlfriend!

Red: You haven't got to see her. Just tell her your sick. Then come back with me!

Stan: But you are not my girlfriend!

Red: Oh, that's just the fucking moral guidance talking! I'll call her, pretend to be your mom, say your'e too sick for this date!

Stan: But Red, I want to be with We...

Red then lunged herself towards Stan and the two locked lips. A 10 second long kissed ensued. Stan finally broke free of the hold...

Stan: Ew! Gross! I got F'N cooties!

Red: Oh, quit grossing out and enjoy the fucking experience!

Red then stood took off her sweater and pants to reveal a fashionable and attractive dress set. After seconds of teasing, Stan gave in to the temptation...

Stan: Okay! Just this once! If you really want me! Just make sure the lie to Wendy is a convincing one...

Red then got out her mobile and rang Wendy on hers, who was sitting in the restaurant...

Wendy: Hello? Who is this?

Red then perfectly mimicks Sharon Marsh's voice...

Red: Um, hello. This is Stan's mother. I am calling to tell you that my son won't be able to date you tonight! He is terribly sick! He has.. er...

Red: *Whisper to Stan* What do you have?

Stan: Just say I have severe foot fungus!

Red: What! Really!

Wendy: Excuse me Mrs Marsh but is there a problem?

Red: Yes, my son is groaning really loudly, I'll have to attend to him right away!

Wendy: Wait a minute.. Mrs Marsh.. you don't even have my number!

Red: Er.. Stan told me, you must have told him...

Wendy: Okay then Mrs Marsh, I understand...

Red: Goodbye! *Turns signal off* Score! Now we can go and do it!

Stan: Oh yeah! Wait, WHAT!

Needless to say, Stan and Red were up all night kissing, and.. you know.. doing it! How will Wendy react? Find out in the next chapter...


	2. Chapter 2

South Park: Stanley and Wendy star in 'Twisted love.'

Chapter 2: A hidden experience...

The next day, at school, Stan had to somehow move on from what I did the night before, but how?

Stan: Red, can I talk to you?

Red: Yeah, sure big boy...

Stan: Listen, about last night, it was all a...

Red: Save it! I've heard it all before, like on every TV show I watch. You'll tell me last night was a mistake and you'll stick with your girlfriend and move on simply because you don't want to get in trouble! Listen, I know you truly love me, you just have to accept how life will be first!

Red walks off as Kyle approaches Stan from behind, he has his arms crossed and an angry face...

Kyle: Dude, what the hell was that all about!

Stan: Listen, yesterday I...

Kyle: That was a rhetorical question retard! I know what you did, you slept with Red, didn't you!

Stan: Wait, what's it to you?

Kyle: I want a best friend who I can trust. If you are willing to cheat on your girlfriend then who says that you won't cheat on me!

Stan: I.. wait, what the fuck!

Kyle: That cam out wrong. What I meant was that I can't trust you as a friend to do the right thing if this is how you act! You gotta clean yourself up man!

Stan: Look, just stay out of it, okay...

Kyle: It's your funeral, Stan...

Later, at the lockers...

Wendy: hey, Stan, how are you feeling?

Stan: What do you mean?

Wendy: You were sick last night, your mom said. You couldn't make it to our date?

Stan: Oh right! Er.. yeah, I'm okay now! Thanks...

Wendy: Do you wanna catch a movie together tonight?

Stan: Yeah, sure...

Wendy: Cool, catch ya later dude!

Wendy walks away as Stan goes up to Kyle...

Stan: Ha! See, I am a trustworthy friend!

Kyle: Okay, I still don't see how the red-razors are gonna take this though...

Stan: The red-razors?

Kyle: That Red chick you went out with is secretly part of a rough girls club. They do stuff at night, by hitting on any male they can find! Just like you and Bertha last night, they always do that! Any male who actually turns one of them down usually recieves a fierce pounding at night by the group. They are all red-headed girls and Bertha is a key member!

Stan: Jesus dude! What am I gonna do? I have to dump her to save my relationship with Wendy but I don't want a bunch of girls kicking my ass!

Kyle: Like I said earlier, it's your funeral dude!

Kyle walked away as Stan panicked...

Later, after school, Stan walked up to his girlfriend...

Stan: Wendy, listen, I have to tell you something, you see, I...

Wendy: I know, Stan. You went on a one night stand with Red last night...

Stan: WHAT? How did you know?

Wendy: Red made the signs as obvious as possible. She had a picture of you in her locker, she kept smiling every time she past you!

Stan: I take it you are not very happy about this...

Wendy: Not at first, but then I talked to Kyle about it. She said he knows how I feel but in the end I should accept it. I mean, I went out with Gregory and Token, and even Eric Cartman, but, in the end you still forgave me. I guess I should return the favour, huh?

Stan: Wow! That's really cool Wendy! I don't even deserve that...

Wendy: Look, it's the red razors who you should be worried about. I mean, when you dump Bertha, she is gonna make you their number one target!

Stan: Oh believe me, I know! This is why I'll have her fall in love with someone else without her knowing I made it happen, then it's forgive and forget!

Wendy: How will you ever do that?

Stan: Believe me, I know how...

And with that, Stan knew what he had to do to avoid both hurt and humiliation...


	3. Chapter 3

South Park: Stanley and Wendy star in 'Twisted love.'

Chapter 3: The hunt is on...

Stan, in attempt to find Red another girl, goes to Clyde...

Stan: Hey, Clyde. How would you like a date with Bertha?

Clyde: You mean that red haired chick in our class?

Stan: Yeah, she's super hot! Will you go out with her?

Clyde: Why the fuck do you want me to...

Stan: Look, will you do it or not?

Clyde: Give me a buck!

Stan: Okay, now go and talk to her...

Clyde then walks up to Bertha...

Clyde: Hey Red, how about we go on a date tonight, here's a dollar...

Stan: *Whisper* That's what he wanted the dollar for!

Red: But.. I already have a boyfriend!

Clyde: Forget about him and go out with a real sex king!

Stan: Hey, don't put me down! Ot-oh...

Red and Clyde hear Stan and then turn their attention to him...

Red: There you see, that is my boyfriend!

Clyde: Think again, because he put me up to this...

Red: What? Stan, how could you fucking do this to me!

Clyde: Later momma fuckers!

Stan: Listen, it's just that I...

Red: Are you trying to dump me! ME!

Stan: Look, I love Wendy, okay. Our night was a mistake! It's over between us!

Red: Believe me little boy, one night, us razor's are gonna fuck you up! You don't know where, or when, but we'll fucking get you and then beat you down!

Red walks off in anger while Stan is in hyper-shock mode...

Later, Stan talks to Butters about what to do...

Stan: Butters, help me...

Butters: Oh hey Stan. What is it?

Stan: How do I avoid.. the RED RAZORS!

Butters: Oh.. hamburgers! I shouldn't even be fucking talking to you...

Stan: Look, why are the Red razors such feared people?

Butters: The Razor's are a group of red-haired female thugs who attack kids from sixth grade and under. There's Samurai Samantha, a tenth grader who is a black belt in karate. Then there are 3 muscular eight graders, and there are two scrappy fifth-graders...

Stan: Oh jesus dude!

Butters: Why are they after you anyway?

Stan: I kinda dumped Bertha, she's part of the group...

Butters: Good god! She and Lola are the two fourth-grade members.. Lola dye's her hair red to be part of the group...

Stan: How do I prevent a beating from them?

Butters: Every target they have ever made they have gotten to. It is just a matter of time! Now i'm gonna ask you to leave, because I really don't wanna be near you right now!

Stan: Just.. fucking.. great! Thanks for fuck all Butters!

Later that night, Wendy went to talk to Red about letting Stan go...

Wendy: Listen Red, can't you just let Stan off with this one?

Red: No Wendy! Stan must pay, the razor's rep is hanging on this one...

Wendy: Look, it's your own fault! You seduced Stan while he had a girlfriend. That was a catastrophe developed under your fucking idiocracy! Now let him off...

Red: Look, we seem to have had to this conversation before but.. you need to stop digging around Wendy! Stan must pay! Deal with it.. or maybe we'll have two fucking targets to take it...

Wendy: God damn it!

As Red walks off, Bebe comes to Wendy...

Bebe: Listen Wendy! Stan is F-U-C-K-E-D! Face it! You can't stop the razors!

Wendy: I just hope he isn't hurt too badly...

Cartman walks past the girls...

Cartman: Oh believe me, Stan is fucked!

How will Stan overcome this problem? Will he get the beating of a lifetime? Can his girlfriend save him? Find out as you read on...


	4. Chapter 4

South Park: Stanley and Wendy star in 'Twisted love.'

Chapter 4: The sacrifice of the year...

Stan, preventing the attack, phones his parents to drive him home. He can not play out with his friends because he is at danger of a beating...

Randy: Stan, go and play outside!

Stan: I can't!

Randy: Why the fuck not!

Stan: Because.. someone wants to kick the shit out of me!

Randy: Who? WHO!

Stan: Some.. er.. some girls...

Randy: *Laughs* Seriously Stan. Your a pussy!

Randy: Look, Stan. We'll call the school and the police tommorow. They'll sort out a restraining order for you!

Stan: Thanks dad! But tonight I gotta stay the fuck in my room!

Meanwhile, it's dark and it's night. Wendy is walking down the street. No one is present, as she thinks to herself...

Wendy's thoughts: I know this is all my fault! Stan was being unfaithful because.. I was unfaithful. All those boyfriends, Gregory, Token, Bryden.. If only I was faithful he would have never gone out with Red and this whole thing would have never happened! I need to find a way to fix all this crap...

Just then, 3 muscular, large girls grabbed her and pulled into an alley...

Wendy: Get off me you fucking pricks!

Red: Let her go girls, this one's mine!

Wendy: Red, what are you doing here?

Red: This is the hangout of the Red Razors! And we pulled you in to settle some business, involving your boyfriend, Stan Marsh! You see, we have been trying to find him all night, but we can't seem to see him anywhere. We believe he's hiding in his house! We need you to get us to him, your a person he can trust, you see...

Wendy: Why would I fucking help you do that to my boyfriend!

Red: You are gonna help us find Stan Marsh.. or else, you'll be considered the next best thing!

Wendy: Listen, you are gonna have to get through me to get to Stan!

Red: That's exactly what I am saying, duh!

Wendy then thinks to herself, one on eight she has no chance! But one on one with Red, she has a chance to stop her...

Wendy: Okay Red, listen here. If you razor's are such tough people you shouldn't have to take me 8 on 1, Red, you should fight me yourself!

Red: What are you getting at?

Wendy: Me and you. If I win, you leave both me and Stan alone!

Red: Okay then, but if I win, you lead us to Stan, and let us kick his ass!

Wendy: Deal!

Red: Okay then, girls, go and find something to do! Me and her have some business to take care of...

The others left and only Wendy and Red remained. Both girls got ready to fight as they took their coats off, Wendy had the same white unicorn shirt she had on when fighting Cartman. Red had a pink shirt with a rainbow on it. Both girls tied their hair into ponytails. Wendy then through her beret off, but it unfortunately landed into some water...

Wendy: Now look what you fucking made me do! That beret was priceless!

Wendy and Red ran up to eachother and a brutal fistfight begun. Every punch delivered by one, the other gave one back twice as hard. Cries of pain were heard from both girls as they were being punched, kicked and brutally attacked by eachother...

Just then officer Barbrady walk down the alley way to check what was going on.. he saw two nine/ten year old girls beating the shit out of eachother. He decided not to get involved was the best thing to do, and he walked away...

The two went at it for ten straight minutes, they dragged eachother behind a couple of trashcans. After a few more hits, you could hear a big knockout punch, a head being slammed into the wall, and one being knocked unconscious...

From behind the trash cans, a black haired girl emerged from the battle, ot was Wendy. She managed to win the fight and beat up Bertha. This sealed the deal, the Razors had to leave her and Stan alone...


	5. Chapter 5

South Park: Stanley and Wendy star in 'Twisted love.'

Chapter 5: The god damn ending...

The day after the fight took place, Wendy went into the school to tell Stan the good news...

Wendy: Hey, Stan, guess what?

Stan: What the fuck happened to you? Where did those bruises come from?

Wendy: That's what I'm trying to tell you! You know how the Red Razors are after you? Their not. Because, you see, I ran into them last night, and I spoke to Bertha. And, things got a bit ugly between us two! But in the end, I kicked her ass! And the deal was for her and the group to leave you alone! You see, you are now in the clear!

Stan: Wow! Thanks and everything for that.. but, you really didn't have to...

Wendy: Heh, what do you mean?

Stan: I told my dad about them coming after me, and we went to file for a restraining order this morning. None of the Razors can touch me legally or else they will be arrested!

Wendy: WHAT! But I did all this, for you! I brutalized my second best friend after Bebe to protect you!

Stan: Yeah, I could see, when she walked by me this morning. Fuck was she cut up and in pain, what did you do to her!

Wendy: But Stan...

Stan: Listen, you did a great thing anyway. I'm glad I have a girlfriend who cares! But, you didn't have to, I already had it sorted. Thanks anyway.. Now I'm off to play with Kyle and the guys.. see ya round Wendy!

Wendy: Yeah, great! See you...

Wendy then walked over to Bebe at her locker...

Bebe: Jesus christ Wendy, what happened to you!

As Wendy holds her bloodied cheek in pain she says...

Wendy: Eh, nothing really. But someone got a fucking lesson taught to them...

Wendy then walked off smiling though still in pain, but overall happy that she was able to protect her boyfriend.. in a way!

THE FUCKING END!


End file.
